My mind is still reeling...

I don't think I've really relaxed for a second since I got my BFP a week ago. Like Divasaur, I'm anxious about all the things that could go wrong and I just hope every day that my pregnancy continues. Every time I go to the bathroom, I check the toilet paper and pray that I don't see any spotting. (Thankfully, I haven't had any.) I think knowing too much and lurking on certain boards just makes me more paranoid because I see how many people have early losses. Ignorance really is bliss.

It doesn't help any that I still don't "feel" pregnant. Not that I want to feel nauseous, because I don't. But a little more breast tenderness would be welcome at this point! Just so that I know that my body is doing what it's supposed to. I think the only thing I've felt so far is intense hunger. Like every 2 hours. No cravings, and nothing in particular sounds very appetizing. I just physically feel hungry in a bad way.

I had my first appointment on Thursday, two days after my BFP, at 12 DPO. As I mentioned, I had gone to see my doctor the week prior (at 5 DPO) to discuss my long, irregular cycles. I PIAC and they did a pregnancy test in office at that appointment, which was negative. They also ordered bloodwork, which included a quantitative hCG. The results were <2. So when I was there a week later saying I was pregnant, the girl who checked my weight and blood pressure (I don't think she was a nurse) said that my results the week before were negative. She looked at me incredulously when I told her the date of my LMP and that I knew I ovulated late. She asked if I took a home pregnancy test. Duh. I told her I took 3 and they were all positive. She went to do my urine pregnancy test and didn't mention the results. She just sent us into a room to wait to see the nurse practitioner (NP). I told the NP that I knew when I ovulated so I knew how far along I was, approximately. But she said they only go by LMP for due date, which would put me four weeks further along than I am. So she ordered an ultrasound for dating. It's the best thing that has come out of having long, irregular cycles. I'm so excited to see our little one! Because I'm going out of town and didn't want to wait until after I get back to do it, it will be done at 5w5d. I know the heartbeat doesn't often show up until 6 weeks, but I'm hoping our little one will be a couple days ahead of schedule. I think I'll feel a lot more at ease once I see the heartbeat and know that there really is something growing inside me. My first beta came back at 166 at 12 DPO. From what I've seen online, that's pretty high. I didn't think I'd get another one, but yesterday I got a call from the doctor's office. They called to let me know that I had a UTI (like Divasaur, I was asymptomatic) and that they sent a prescription to my pharmacy. Honestly, I'm not convinced I really have one, as I've never had one before. And since the urine culture is just a clean catch and not sterile, there is a high chance of contamination. But whatever. It's just the nurse in me coming out. I'll take my antibiotics and be done with it. It can't hurt. I digress. They also told me they wanted me to do another hCG. Not sure why, because she said that all my labs were within normal limits. But, again, whatever. It might be better for me to see that my betas are doubling normally. It might put my mind at ease if they are. I hope! The problem is that they post my results online and since last night I've been checking every 15 minutes to see if they're there!

I swear, the days seem to be dragging for me, while I look at everyone else's pregnancies and time seems to be flying by. I'm guessing everyone probably feels that way? Just as TTC is a waiting game, the whole pregnancy is a waiting game! For now, I'm waiting for my second hCG. Then I'll be counting down for my first ultrasound. All this waiting is going to kill this impatient 'saur!