Baby Making Sex

Okay this may be an over-share or TMI, but hey! You're reading a TTC blog, so of course there's gonna be some sex talk. So, put on your big girl panties and get in-touch with your inner Dr. Ruth...

With the decision to TTC this cycle has come a whole new approach to making love. Mind you, I have been sexually active for nearly 20 years so at this point, I feel pretty seasoned at the doing the horizontal mambo. Well, I am learning that when you start to FWP it's a whole new dance.

First of all, let me just say that the first couple of times have been a little mentally challenging. I guess I have just realized how automatically programmed the lingering thought, "I hope I don't get pregnant" becomes after 20 years of knocking boots but not wanting to be knocked-up! This of course is probably magnified because for 18.5 years of doing it there was always a condom involved. And condoms seem to provide a whole list of "oh nos!" and "oops!" moments. At least in my experience. Honestly, once I started on BCP right before our wedding I already felt a huge sense of relief and freedom (and frankly, an increase in pleasure). Now that we're going for the gusto, For the first time in my life there are no "oh nos!" surrounding the deed itself.

I have found that there is a renewed excitement in the intimate time that Mr. Divasaur and I share. Not that it wasn't great before, but now that we're trying to make a baby it's like we're more intune with each other and more connected. And we're having fun, which I am thankful for since I have read on many TTC boards that it can start to feel like a chore. The last thing I ever want is to feel like sex is on the list of things to do along with laundry and balancing the checkbook!

Are you still with me? C'mon, don't be shy. We all know where babies come from and how they get here!

Of course there are some things we have to take into consideration now that we're FWP. First, the best lubrication is natural CM. If that happens to be lacking then we need to use Preseed as saliva and other forms lube kill sperm. We're still trying to figure out how much saliva is too much when it comes to foreplay and for the life of me, Googling it hasn't yielded any concrete feedback.

Also, some experts purport that certain positions are better for getting the swimmers to their target. So, we still mix it up, but make sure that when the time comes (literally) we are in the missionary position which is purportedly the best baby-making position besides doggie style. Finally, there are mixed reports on frequency...some say every day, especially in the fertile window is good. Others say try to do it every other day so the daddy-wanna-be has time to get his sperm reserves built back up to maximum capacity. Right now we're just paying attention to my fertility signs (thanks to BBT, CM and CBEFM all plugged into Fertility Friend) and making sure we're active as much as we can muster during the "green" (predicted higher fertility) days. Most all, we're making sure we having fun and enjoying the process. Personally, I think practice makes perfect.