Did you know I used to be a phlebotomist (aka "Vampire") in my last life? Yes, I did. I find that going to get my blood drawn is nerve wracking because I know exactly what they're doing wrong.
I usually don't tell the Vampire that I used to be a Vampire too, because then they get all flustered and end up making the entire procedure far more painful than it needs to be.
But today, for some reason, I decided to share this little tidbit of information with the poor dude collecting my blood. He asked me what I do now, so I told him I'm a lawyer. And then he told me that he's a med student. .......... And that he learned phlebotomy on farm animals while living up near Alaska.
Seriously? Farm animals. Really? That little statement did not inspire confidence in me at all. And I was right to be concerned. He was not very good.
But, after he was done collecting my blood, removing the tourniquet at the wrong time and jamming the cotton ball on my arm while the NEEDLE WAS STILL IN MY VEIN (owwie!), he looked up at me all earnest-like. He asked "Do I get a gold star?"
Because today I'm exactly 4 weeks and 0 days pregnant and I love my baby, I looked at him and said "You did okay, kid." Who am I to crush his dreams?
Now, let's just hope these levels bring nothing but good news! (And let's hope I don't get farm-animal-boy again on Friday's blood draw.)
0 thoughts:
Post a Comment