C-Section talk - Wash your mouth out!

I can't believe its Friday again, its the wee hours of the morning and my bed and I are not getting along. We have consistently been getting home around 9pm all week, so my house is a disaster and I am just worn out but I can't bear to lay down. My legs are restless, my stomach is in the way and I cannot find a comfortable position.

The weekly checkup was yesterday morning, it was fine. I met with a doctor I normally don't. They recommend that in the event you get whoever is on call when you are about to deliver. It was a He. Really no biggie at this point, it seems like everyone has seen me pants off lately but he just didn't know me, asked questions all about my gestational diabetes and as he was walking out he says something about having a big baby and that it looks like we are heading towards a c-section.

Mmmm. Excuse me. What was that, I must have misheard you. Of course I smile and nod, holding back my tears and as soon as the door closes I lower my head and just start crying. My baby is growing quickly, I know she is big for her gestational age, but really is this what everyone is thinking and you were just the first to say it. Now I have really just surrendered myself to the fact that pregnancy is like nothing else you can expect. It doesn't happen on the first try, it doesn't seem to go to the way you think and you sure as hell can't plan anything to do with it. Knowing those things I have not put together a "birth plan" per say but I had an idea of how I would like the birth to be and a c-section was never really in that picture. I would like to labor at home for as long as I can, I would like to see how my body acts, if I want an epidural I will get one, if I feel like I can do it on my own I want to. Now you are telling me to skip steps 1 and 2 and go straight to 3.

I clearly didn't like that answer.

I will be talking to the next doctor next Thursday to hopefully get a different answer. I will go for an ultrasound in a week and a half-ish to check her size again and from there we will have a better understanding of what the next step is. The Mr. thinks they may take me then but at this point who knows.