Taking It Easy

After a wild weekend, I had a follow up visit w/ my Dr. on Wednesday and everything looks good! Baby was very active again and his/her little heart was beating away loud and clear at 160-170 beats a minute. As for the cause of the bleeding, there's not munch explanation. Dr. feels that I may just be one of those women who experience spontaneous bleeding from time to time. She has recommended that I take it easy and refrain from mowing the lawn, moving sheets of tin and pulling weeds for awhile!

We have also been given instructions to abstain from sex for at least the next month! A friend of mine who is very much done having children has asked if I could get her that kind of Dr.'s note! DH was completely OK w/ these orders, he doesn't want to feel as though he at any point has caused a trip to the ER! When we go back the end of May we will once again discuss whether or not this is still necessary but my Dr.'s advice personally, was to try and abstain throughout the rest of the pregnancy only for peace of mind. That's a little longer than I'd like but am willing to do what's best for the Baby!

Taking it easy isn't as easy! I am normally the person in our household who takes care of all of the outside chores. That includes the mowing, which I am pretty particular about! Also, now that the weather has changed over to Spring, DS is all about the great outdoors! It's hard for me to sit and watch him play and not get distracted by weeds that need pulling or seeds that I have been wanting to plant. I don't like to ask for help but might be needing some in the next few months!

I have been looking at it as sort of a way of spending a lot of extra quality time w/ DS. He is starting Preschool this fall and w/ the new baby, he deserves as much alone time w/ Mommy as I can give him. That's really the best part of taking it easy and in a few years when they aren't babies anymore I will look back at these next few months and be thankful for the time I had to take it easy!

Threatened Miscarriage

One of the scariest things an expecting mother can go through is discovering that she is bleeding. I remember all to well what that feels like from my first pregnancy. I was at work, running around like a mad woman. I had put off going to use the restroom for much too long and finally couldn't take it anymore! I ran upstairs for what I thought was going to be a quick trip and discovered that I wouldn't be returning to the hustle and bustle downstairs.

Luckily I had just told my boss the week before that I was expecting. She was wonderful when I called to tell her that I was leaving for the day, very concerned, didn't make me feel guilty for abandoning my duties for the day and she even called to ask if everything was OK later that afternoon. And everything did turn out OK! I was treated for a threatened miscarriage and sent home to rest for the weekend.

When I found out I was pregnant this time one of the first questions I asked was if I'd experience this again. My Dr. told me that my chances were higher since I'd experienced it before but after visiting w/ her on Wednesday, I thought that I was probably past that.

I was very tired yesterday. I had fallen asleep on our couch in the afternoon and when I woke up to use the bathroom I was bleeding, heavily! My DH called the ER immediately and we were told to head straight there. Our hospital is 20 minutes away and I've never seen my DH drive that fast w/ DS in the car, ever! (I kept thinking to myself that it didn't matter how fast he drove, if I was miscarrying, there wasn't anything the doctors would be able to do.)

When we got there the ER nurse took my blood pressure and checked my temperature. She then began looking for the heartbeat w/ the Doppler. That was agonizing! My Dr. had found the heartbeat right away on Wednesday but the nurse looked a little longer than we were comfortable with. But, she found it... beating away at 160 again! The on call OB had ordered another sonogram so we were sent to radiology next.

My DH wasn't along the first time we got to see the baby or hear the heartbeat, he got to hear and see both this time! Everything looked good, nothing concerned the Dr. and after the pelvic exam he sent us on our way. My cervix was closed, there were no tears and more than likely the cause of the bleeding was a ruptured blood vessel. I will wait to hear from my Dr. today to see what we do next. Obviously I am supposed to take it easy, no heavy lifting, no sex! But I plan on doing whatever is needed to ensure that everything stays alright!

We were also told that I am a week farther along than we thought which makes my due date October 28th... we might just have two October babies!

160 Beats a Minute

I woke up this morning feeling really excited and really nervous! Last week at my appointment when the Dr. went searching for a heartbeat, she didn't have much luck. Today, however, was a little different! DH was unable to attend today's big event due to work but DS was along and very excited to hear what "Baby" had to say!

While we were busy getting ready to leave this morning DS asked if the Dr. was going to take the baby out today! I think he's a little confused right now about when we will meet "Baby"! I again explained to him that the Dr. won't take "Baby" out until after his 4th birthday. He then wanted to know if the baby could talk and what he/she could say.
When the Dr. came in she asked DS if he was excited to hear the baby, he placed his head on my tummy and said "yes"! The Doppler picked up the tiny sound immediately! She told us that the tiny heart was beating at 160 beats a minute and that everything sounded perfect... pphheewwww! DS went on to tell the Dr. that the baby is a boy and that he is really excited to play w/ him. Even though I would really, really love to have a little girl, I'd be totally OK w/ another little boy!

Busy, busy, busy!

I know that once again it has been ages since I have posted. I have been baking cakes like crazy for my clients and working at a local bakery to help them out. This is going to have to stop pretty soon and I'm going to have to take it a little easier before I fall asleep face first into a cake.
I've had a few appointments and according to my doctor, everything has been measuring perfectly. I feel huge but I've only gained around 6 lbs. so far. Baby's heartbeat has been steadily between 140-150 every time. I have a doppler at home also and I love hearing her little heartbeat.
As far as movement goes, she's off and on. Some days she's really lazy and only moves a little bit and then she'll have a few days where she won't stop moving. I can see her moving if I watch my belly and that is the neatest thing I have ever seen! Unfortunately, every time Mr. Bakersaur is around, she freezes and won't move again until he's gone.
I'm getting more and more nervous about the actual delivery. I've finally admitted to myself that even though I had originally wanted an all natural birth, there will most likely be an epidural involved. I don't have much of a pain tolerance no matter how tough I would like to be.
The nursery isn't even close to finished. Many people tell me I still have plenty of time but 13 weeks just doesn't seem like long enough to me. The only thing I have is the crib and bedding. I do have 2 baby showers coming up, one in May on Mother's Day weekend and the second in June. I can't wait for those because I haven't seen most of my family and friends since I got pregnant.

I'll update again soon and I promise I won't wait so long next time.

GOOD LUCK BIBLIOSAUR!!!

It's time

In case anyone missed me...

I have been on a bit of a hiatus from blogging over the last month. After I threw the thermometer in the drawer I have had many ups and downs. The ups are that I don't think about having another baby every day, more like just a few times a week...which is pretty miraculous for me. The downs being that seeing babies and people having new babies is often very difficult emotionally. I simply try to avoid reading about anything baby related, or focusing too much on anything that has to do with pregnancy and newborns.

I honestly know that I've done the right thing for myself and my family by giving up on ttc. I have had a sense of release. Almost like I've given myself permission to accept that I may only have one child naturally. This is definitely not an easy thing to accept, but it has helped me to not be anxious and pity myself that I haven't had more kids by now.

I say all this to let you know that I think my time on Pregosaur has come to a close. I know I've only been on here for a short time, but I think this is best for me. I figure if I am done ttc & I have a hard time even coming to the site and reading other peoples posts, that I really shouldn't overstay my welcome.

I pray that one day I will get my BFP, but I'm not anxiously counting on it. I really love that I have to count or look at a calendar to figure out what day of my cycle I am on. Maybe some day I'll be one of those people that wakes up suddenly and says "wow, I think my period is late" and I'll take a test and be dumbfounded when I see two lines. I pray that I can be caught off guard by pregnancy. I've always wanted to be one of those women....

So, to all of you in ttc and pregnancy land... thank you for being so supportive of my ttc endeavors.

May God shower you with the blessing of perfect babies.

T-minus 21 hours!

I'm going to try to keep this as short as I can...it's a bit long and complicated, sorry!

So after I saw my gestational diabetes doctor on Thursday, I went up to the local hospital to see the alternate high risk doctor. He said that if it was up to him, he'd induce me that night...but it wasn't. The problem was that my hospital couldn't handle my birth because it was too complicated (this is after my other doctor and all of the nurses telling me numerous times that it wouldn't pose a problem - I was NOT amused). My case had to be transferred to an alternate hospital, which is about a 45-minute drive away.

So we went up there Thursday night; I couldn't see their high risk specialist until the next day, so I got to spend a cozy night in THE most uncomfortable hospital bed ever (I mean seriously, insanely uncomfortable).

I saw the specialist the next day, and she felt that there was no need for an emergency induction because my blood pressure, while high, was still only just over the limit and my GD was well managed. So she scheduled me for an induction 5 days later but said she wanted to keep me in the hospital for observation until then. Joy.

The reason for the delayed scheduling is because although this hospital is larger than the one in my town, it's still not huge by any means, and she wanted to make sure that it would take place on a day when I would have all of the staff to myself vs sharing them with another induction (there were already inductions scheduled for the two days prior to mine). I guess that's the one disadvantage to staying relatively local vs going to Sydney (the nearest major city), where I'd almost certainly have been induced the same night I arrived.

I was pretty upset about all of this...not just having to stay in the hospital or having to wait to be induced, but also because I'm already so uncomfortable (the skin on my stomach is so tight that I can barely even stand the feeling of a sheet on it - even that hurts). But obviously, there wasn't much I could do about it.

After spending two nights in the hospital, the specialist told me that because my blood pressure wasn't getting any worse - it had actually dropped down to just below the limit and seemed to be staying there - she would release me so I could go home to wait until the induction, as I'd almost certainly be less stressed and more relaxed and comfortable. They gave me a laundry list of symptoms to look out for, and if I experience even a single one of them we have to head back to the hospital. I also have to get my blood pressure checked daily at my local hospital to make sure it doesn't spike.

So that's where we are now - the induction is starting at lunchtime tomorrow, only 21 hours away! I'll be 38.5 weeks by then, and no one - including yours truly - can believe that we've made it this far (and honestly we probably shouldn't have been allowed to get this far because of all my complications, but that's really neither here nor there at this point). But at least they won't be considered preemies, although they'll probably still be a bit smaller than a singleton - it also means it's unlikely that they'll have any health problems, which means we'll be able to transfer back to my local hospital a day or so after the birth (much better for Mr Bibliosaur since he won't have to drive back and forth all the time).

Please send happy thoughts and good vibes and labor dust and everything else that you can spare! There isn't any wireless internet access in the hospital that I'm aware of, so the next time you hear from me, the Bibliosaur babies will have made their debut!

OMG...I could be getting induced!

I just got home from seeing the doctor who is overseeing my gestational diabetes. While I was there, he asked me what the plan was, and that conversation got him all riled up and pissed off at the hospital...

Me: "The plan?"
Him: "Right. You know, for the birth. You're very nearly 38 weeks."
Me: "Oh. Well...there isn't one."
Him (after a long pause): "What do you mean?"
Me: "Well I saw Dr S [my OBGYN] yesterday, and he thinks I need to be induced, but it's not up to him - it's up to the doctors at the hospital. And Dr H [high risk doctor that I see at the hospital clinic] is still on vacation and will be for a while longer, so I'm seeing other doctors until then. It's a different doctor every week, depending on who is filling in for him."
Him: "So...who is making this decision?"
Me: "I don't know. Whoever is there at my appointment next week, I guess? Maybe?"
Him: "But you don't know who that will be."
Me: "No."
Him: "And they may or may not decide to induce you next week."
Me: "Right."
Him: "Do they know you have GD?"
Me: "Yes."
Him: "And they know you're having twins, right?"
Me: "Yes, of course."
(another long pause)
Him: "RIGHT. Look, I don't usually get mixed up in the obstetrics side of things, but I'm going to call the hospital right now. This is ridiculous - you don't have anyone caring for your case!"

So he called the hospital, talked to the head nurse and gave her a rundown of the situation, then asked to be transferred to Dr N. I'd never been told about this doctor, but apparently he's another high risk specialist like Dr H. My GD doctor told Dr N: "She is 37.5 weeks pregnant with twins. She has gestational diabetes. Her blood pressure has shot up to 150/90. She has edema. She is clearly extremely uncomfortable and struggling. She needs someone to make a decision about her case - NOW."

So I'm seeing Dr N at 4.45pm today. My GD doctor told me to be prepared to be admitted, just in case they decide I need to go in tonight (!!!). Of course, Dr N may want to schedule it for tomorrow (!!!), or - you never know - he may even decide I can wait until next week (which is still a yaaay because at least a decision would have been made!).

I'm equal parts excited and terrified that this could be happening so soon...on the one hand, I am SO READY for these babies to be born, and on the other hand, I'm utterly petrified at the thought! It almost makes me want to go, "Wait! Maybe they can stay in there another 10 or 15 years. Let's all just sit down and talk - we can negotiate!" (Mr Bibliosaur, by the way, is beside himself at the idea that he could get to meet his sons so soon - he has been SO eager and impatient for these little ones to be born!)

So please send some good vibes or happy thoughts or whatever else you can spare that everything will go smoothly, no matter what Dr N decides. Honestly, it's just nice to have someone who will actually be able to make a decision about my case!

Birth Story for Sophie

I wrote this birth story for Sophie's baby book. It lacks a lot of the numbers and time details, but it's her story and I think it's a beautiful one.

Little Sophie it must have been very nice inside Mommy because you did not want to leave the comfort of my belly. Your due date, March 24, 2010, came and went without any sign of your arrival. A week and a half later you were still hanging out inside Mommy so our doctor set a date for you to finally be induced. Your birthday was going to be April 2, 2010. On April 1, 2010 your Granny and Aunt Lexi arrived from Florida and Mommy was there at the airport to pick them up. Lexi came in first and Granny followed shortly after. While Aunt Lexi and I were waiting for Granny to get in I started to feel some very minor contractions. Since I wasn’t in any pain, we continued on and met Daddy for a sushi dinner once Granny got in. After dinner Mommy dropped Granny and Lexi off at their hotel so that we could all get some rest before the big day. Daddy and I headed home and just as we got into bed for the night I felt my water break. Daddy called the doctor and he wanted us to come in right away. Mommy called to let Granny and Lexi know that the show was starting earlier than expected. We were all excited that you finally wanted to arrive. Daddy and I checked into the Labor and Delivery unit and were taken to a room. Once I got changed and answered a bunch of questions we got started. Our first nurse wasn’t able to get my IV started and Mommy had to be stuck 3 times before the IV was finally placed. My antibiotics were started so that we would both be Group B Strep free when you were born. Usually after your water breaks contractions start on their own. For some reason I decided to not start contracting after my water broke. The doctors and nurses gave me an hour or so before starting the Pitocin to see if I would start, but I never did. The Pitocin was started and the dose was increased every thirty minutes. Neither one of us enjoyed the Pitocin. It made Mommy’s contractions very strong and pretty close together. You didn’t like the Pitocin either. The nurses had to either turn off the Pitocin or turn it down because you couldn’t tolerate it. After tolerating as much as I could on my own, I requested pain medication. The first medication that they gave me, Stadol, helped to ease the pain slightly. I got a second dose of Stadol and was in the process of requesting a third dose when they decided that I should get an epidural. I was still only 1cm dilated and about 75% effaced at that point even though I had been laboring for several hours. I wasn’t scared of getting an epidural like I’ve heard some people are. It took three anesthesiologists and six sticks before they finally got the epidural in place. It was worth every stick in my opinion. The epidural was amazing once it was finally in and working. It was at that point that I was able to relax and sleep and that’s when you started moving down and I started dilating more. Several hours after the epidural was placed we were ready to start pushing. After 20 hours of labor, we worked together for another hour and a half before you were finally laid on my chest and screamed your little heart out. Daddy, Granny, and Lexi were all there in the room with me to witness your first breath of life. Little Sophie, your entrance into this world was not the easiest thing that I’ve ever done, but having you here and being able to kiss your sweet little cheeks makes it all worth while. You are the most precious little girl and your daddy and I are so excited that you are finally here with us. We’re looking forward to watching you grow into the amazing person that you are going to be and helping to guide you through life.

Here are a few pictures of our little doll.

Pregnancy as well as labor and delivery weren't exactly what I thought they were going to be. The good times were finding out that we were pregnant, the ultrasounds and feeling the babys kicks, but there was also a whole lot more pain and discomfort than I expected. The end result made it all worthwhile though. Life with a newborn is crazy, exciting, tiring, and exhilarating. Little Sophie is my first priority right now which is why I'm making this my last Pregosaur post. I will still be reading and cheering on all of you that are still pregnant and/or trying to conceive. This has been an amazing journey and I thank all of you for letting me share my experiences with you.

-Mrs. Luckysaur

Pressing the Panic Button

I'm currently at 39 weeks and starting to feel the anxiety kicking in. My hormones haven't been too bad, but lately they seem to be changing and kicking into high gear. I feel scared about the birth now, and felt so comfortable about it before! I am constantly worrying about how my decisions are going to affect others rather than focusing on how I am feeling, and I know that it's not helping or healthy. I'm trying to stop by actually telling the people I'm having trouble with what is going on with me.

Since my last post (two weeks ago, I believe) I have had three appointments. The first was a great consultation at my house to make sure that if I were to want to stay home to deliver I could. Everything on that front is just fine. Our rental house will be suitable and my midwife would like to discuss inducing if I go later than ten days which is right at the end of the month (May 1) anyway. We will labour at home for as long as possible and then decide when the time comes whether to head to the hospital or stay at home. I would LOVE to stay at home, but this is where the thinking of others plays in. I know that I can list probably at least five people that will actually be angry at us if we were to make that decision. I should not have to think about that, but yet it occupies much of my thoughts.

My next appointment was interesting as I surprised myself by agreeing to an internal when I thought I would say no unless absolutely necessary. It was a positive experience. My midwife was incredibly gentle and even though my cervix is posterior she managed to do what she needed to without any pain. She said that the baby's head is down so low that it was almost difficult to get past it to even reach my cervix! I obviously googled posterior cervix to make sure I understood what she was explaining about it, and it's both common and nothing to worry about. Apparently, the cervix can move about with ease and tends to come forward during active labour.

Then at my most recent appointment I surprised myself yet again and agreed to strip my membranes. I am concerned that this will be a big baby and from what I could research about stripping the membranes it can help bring on labour if you are close already and doesn't seem to be unhealthy with a pregnancy that is progressing normally (such as no placenta previa etc.). Because my cervix is still posterior it was a tad more difficult to accomplish, and interestingly it didn't actually hurt, but there was alot of pressure in my tummy at the front. I bled alot and there was a moment of concern, but as I had just had an ultrasound we knew that my placenta was nowhere near the danger zone. I stopped bleeding fairly soon after, and everything was fine.

Then I had cramps through the night (normal) and woke up to my mucous plug coming out! Wow, I know it's normal, but that was pretty gross... That was yesterday morning so now I'm just waiting to see what will happen next :)

In the crazy life areas our rental house is being shown now, and it's terribly annoying to have to make sure that I tidy up constantly when I'm EX.HAUST.ED. Especially because I am still working full time (plus some OT) and there is really no time between trying to finish last minute things, working, and both houses...

Our rental house is mainly packed but for what we are still using... the new house is coming along great but as with all renos it could be faster... could always go faster.... I am almost done all the main cleaning but it's so difficult to do when there is still some of our stuff in there! Ryan thinks that the painting should be done this week, so I hope to get our stuff moved by the end of the weekend (the stuff we aren't using) and therefore create less to worry about later...

Physically I feel good once I am up and out of bed in the morning, but nighttimes are getting progressively worse. My pelvis and hips seem to lock up in the night and I can't get out of bed without some serious work. It hurts so badly and it's a sharp breath-taking pain that shocks me pretty badly when I'm half asleep and dying to pee. In some ways I need to have some major discomfort because I'm still comfortable enough at this point to keep the little guy inside for another month or so... I need to start to feel that agonizing get this kid out of me- I'll do anything feeling so that I will ready for labour. Right now I feel like work and the house are too crazy to throw the kid in the mix right now!

Have a good week everyone and I'll update again soon!

Joggersaur Family Update

I apologize for my long absence... Things have been a tad crazy in the Joggersaur house.

And since I've been gone so long, I'm going to start from the beginning, but I'll keep it as condensed as possible.

We got married March 2009. We decided to stop using protection after six months of marriage. During those six months, I was super regular, not even a day late.

We hit the six month mark, and I happened to start that day. I thought that worked out perfectly.

Little did I know, that period would be the only period I had until December.

During that time frame, we encountered all kinds of stress (hubby's loss of job, extended stay guest, apartment lease ending, trouble with our downstairs neighbors, and moving in with my in-laws), and my body revolted.

Once I started my period in December, I had no idea how long my next cycle would be.

But due to the move, me being sick for the entire month of January with a sinus infection, followed by a yeast infection, followed by my period. And in that time, my MIL had some serious health problems. So their wasn't much baby dancing going on.

My doctor basically told me I needed to relax and I was making myself sick over and over again.

I got my next visit from Aunt Flo in the beginning of February.

I began to eat differently and exercise consistently. (To date, I've lost 27 lbs.)

My March cycle only took five weeks.

Since then, I've done my best to relax, which is hard while you are in the process of buying land to build a house and living with your inlaws in the smallest bedroom ever, but I am doing my best.

Flo should show up this week or next... And I will be back more often as well!

Hoping to Hear a Heart Beat

One word... EXHAUSTED! Obviously that is no excuse for my lack of blogging here in the past few weeks but when you are falling asleep at the keyboard at 7pm, it's time to hit the sack! That is exactly what happened the other night!

I had my first official OB appointment on Monday. I was really excited because I knew it could be the first time we would hear the baby's heartbeat. My DH took the afternoon off to go along, and boy am I glad he did! I had planned on taking DS even if DH had to work, I wanted him to be there to hear the heartbeat too. I was told to be there about 15 minutes early so we could go over my medical history and because of my DH's excitement we were there 30 minutes early!

After checking in, we sat and waited only a few minutes before we were called back. My nurse made us feel very much at ease and even cut up w/ us a bit at the ridiculousness at some of the standard medical questions. For example... "Have you taken any illegal drugs since the last time you were asked this question?"... two minutes earlier!

DS did pretty well for the first thirty minutes of being trapped in the tiny room but when the questions had all been asked and the Dr. finally came in, he had about enough of sitting there! Our Dr. was nice enough to ask if we'd like to try and get the baby's heartbeat first so then DH and DS could wait in the waiting room during the rest of the procedure. (Thank goodness DH came along, what would I have done w/ DS during the pelvic exam?!)

As the Dr. began trying to get the baby's heartbeat, she explained to us (very nervous parents) that sometimes at 10 weeks it's still a little hard to hear. DS stood alongside the Dr. waiting patiently for her to say, "there it is", unfortunately, that didn't happen. I was hoping she'd keep trying but was a bit relieved when she stopped, the pressure was a bit uncomfortable!

DH took DS out so that we could finish the exam and the Dr. proceeded to reassure me that everything is fine. (She is having me come back next week to try again.) Everything else went well, I was happily surprised to find that I have only gained about 4 pounds back since finding out I was pregnant. I have been so tired lately that my lack of exercise was concerning me a bit!

I am excited to go back next week and hopefully hear the baby. DS continues to ask questions about his "brother" and we are always happy to answer! My sister-in-law had a baby girl last week and we are looking forward to watching our babies grow up together!

TTC on hold for now......

Let me start off by apologizing for not blogging in the last little while. A lot has been going on and I've been putting off my blogging duties!

Mr. Pharmasaur and I saw the fertility specialist on March 25th. The doctor came up with a plan for us to start on my next cycle. Mr. Pharmasaur has a requisition for a sperm analysis which he can do anytime (apparently he will be doing that this coming Wednesday.) We both had the standard infectious disease blood tests required by the clinic. I had a progesterone blood level to see if I'd ovulated (it was CD27 and I had not ovulated at that point.) I highly doubt that I ovulated last cycle.

Then the plan was to wait until CD3, come back in for hormone blood levels and an ultrasound and then start Clomid 100 mg for 5 days. The clinic would have me come back in regularly for cycle monitoring and put us on a schedule of "timed intercourse" to help us conceive.

CD3 ended up being last Wednesday so I went to the clinic early in the morning for my blood work and ultrasound. It feels so strange, walking around the clinic, trying not to be embarrassed to be there. I feel like everyone there is trying not to look at each other - kind of a mixture of feeling uncomfortable and giving others their privacy.

I had the blood work and ultrasound done and I was told to wait for a phone call from the clinic before I took the Clomid. I had a small cyst on my left ovary and if it was estrogen dependent, it would be pointless the take the fertility drug as it could interfere with ovulation.

image source

The clinic did call later that day and told me not to take the Clomid. I was pretty disappointed as I was looking forward to getting some serious help with TTC. My estrogen level was fine at 99. My FSH was high at 32 and my LH (luteinizing hormone) was a bit high at19. They were a little concerned about those numbers. However, they were most concerned with my TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) which was 7.13. The high end of the normal range here in Canada is 5. So, I got another requisition to get my thyroid hormones tested again which I got done last Friday. I am still waiting for those results.

So, there will be no cycle monitoring this month. I also have another blood requisition to repeat my CD3 hormone levels in my next cycle. I have a feeling that my FSH (follicle stimulating hormone) may be too high to use fertility drugs. I may be heading into perimenopause.

Our biggest concern however, is the possibility of hypothyroidism. If this is indeed the case, I will need to be put on medication to bring my thyroid hormones back into balance. This usually takes blood work and several dose adjustments to achieve. If we go ahead and TTC with untreated hypothyroidism, it could put us at risk of miscarriage and birth defects if we can even conceive at all. At the age of 40, any delays like this can really have an impact on our future chances of conception.

Tomorrow, I am going back to the clinic for a sonohysterogram ultrasound which I am not really looking forward too. However, we are doing this to see if there are any physical problems with my reproductive organs that could be preventing conception. After the thyroid hormone surprise, I really hope that there are no more tomorrow!

image source

It´s a blob!

I had my third ultra sound today at the hospital and got to see the most beautiful blob with a heart beat! The doctor said the blob was measuring at 6w4d, which gives us a due date of November 28th. Wow. I can´t believe I got to see a heart beat--I´ve never been able to see one before today, and it is truly an amazing thing to see. Suddenly this baby seems very, very real to me.

After seeing my blob, it was time for me to read through some 14 pages of blaah, blaaah, blaaah before signing the dotted line to participate in the study the hospital is doing. After signing the papers, the form got faxed off to an office which determined if I was to be assigned to the group with only prenatal vitamins, or the group with prenatals and Dalteparin (like lovenox). Lucky me got the group with all the goodies....They sent me home with a garbage bag full of prefilled syringes and prenatals to begin taking daily. Yes, a garbage bag full. They didn´t have any other bags available, and I couldn´t carry all the boxes of stuff without a bag, so a garbage bag it was. The doctor even joked with me, asking me if my car was big enough to haul it all away. I also have an appt. schedule for up to my 24th week of pregnancy when I will have graduated from the study. Wow.

And now I´m off to let this all soak in.

My bags are packed, I'm ready to go...

I think we're officially ready for these babies to make their debut! The nursery is done, I have a fresh manicure and pedicure, there are enough homemade meals in our freezer to feed us for nearly two weeks, Mr Bibliosaur and I went out to see a movie and have dinner last night, and my hospital bags are packed and stashed in the trunk of the car.

I found it really helpful to read what other ladies packed for their hospital stay, so I'll post a list of what's in my bags as well. Like my birth plan, this is a very pared-down list compared to the examples you might find online - after years of traveling, I'm all about packing light! And there was a lot of stuff that I either didn't think I'd use (like magazines/books - I can always chat to Mr Bibliosaur or ask him to get me a few magazines from the maternity waiting area if I get desperate) or simply wasn't interested in (like an iPod since I genuinely don't care about music during labor and delivery, or my own clothes for laboring in since I'm fine with a hospital gown).

Plus, if we can stay at our local hospital - more about that drama here, in case you missed it - it's only 10 minutes away from our house. So if at some point during early labor or in the days after delivery I realize I missed something critical, Mr Bibliosaur can easily run back home to grab it. If we have to go to a hospital further away and I realize I missed something that we can't buy, then oh well - I'll survive.

I've separated things into two bags - my bag, which will be the one Mr Bibliosaur will bring up when we first arrive at the hospital, and the babies' bag, which can stay in the car until after they're born:

MY BAG
For Labor
hospital paperwork (health care card and the special card used in Australia to record maternity health - these are both always in my wallet)
birth plan (several copies)
massage oil/lotion
hair ties
change of clothes and a sweater for Mr Bibliosaur
snacks and change for the vending machines

For Post-Birth
nursing tanks (I'm holding off on buying nursing bras until I get a better idea of what size the hooters will be post-birth)
yoga pants
granny panties
slippers
maternity pads
breast pads
toiletries (travel size): comb, soap, shampoo, conditioner, lip balm, deodorant, toothbrush and toothpaste
Lasinoh cream
pen and paper/notebook
going home outfit (a loose fitting top and maternity jeans)
plastic bag for dirty clothes
cell phone and charger
camera w/ spare batteries/charger

BABIES' BAG
disposable diapers and wipes (yes we're still using cloth, but not for the first 6 weeks or so and most hospitals here don't provide disposable diapers)
preemie outfits (Aus. size 00000) x 4
newborn outfits (Aus. size 0000) x 4
socks x4
hats x2
muslin wraps

OTHER
nursing pillow - I have this one, which is specially designed for feeding twins

We're taking two sizes of baby outfits because I'm unsure which ones will fit our boys. While there's no doubt that they'll be born earlier than the average baby, they're also larger than the average babies are at this age, so they might fit the newborn clothes vs the preemie ones (I've read that with the footed onesies, this is largely a matter of length, not weight).
 
Do you think there's anything critical that I missed? I'm not worried about the little optional extras or luxuries - I just want to make sure I haven't left out any of the necessities.

Want to see a man experience childbirth?

Well, sort of - he gets hooked up to some electrical impulses that simulate something like contractions, and the end result is...interesting.

I think this would be excellent mandatory torture a valuable experience for all men, don't you?