Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Are Your HPT's Laughing at You Too?!

When we first started TTC, I bought HPT's monthly and used them monthly! Every time was the same, another BFN followed by a visit from AF! The last time I used a test I vowed to not do it again until I felt I had a valid reason... only, my valid reasons always seem to get the best of me! So once again, I unwrapped the last of the stockpile in our medicine cabinet and prayed for two lines... and like every other failed attempt, got a BFN! is a wonderful site full of good advice for those of us TTC. I stumbled across this earlier this morning and I swear whoever came up with it must have a camera in my bathroom! Follow these 15 easy steps and you too could look as hopeless as me when taking a HPT!

Step 1...Pee on the stick. (must be sure to hold it under urine stream for a heartbeat longer than recommended just to be sure).

Step 2...Stare at stick while you continue peeing. Feel heart jump when urine passes over the spot where the line would be and it hitches for a second, then gets a dark line...then keeps going, taking your dark line with it to the test window.

Step 3...Place on bathroom counter. Pretend not to stare at it. Let's try to give yourself busy work to keep from looking at it. In fact, your toilet now gets cleaned once per day.

Step 4...Tell yourself you are expecting a BFN. Then start to mist up when you see that it is, in fact, a BFN. Stare at the blank spot for a full minute before picking it up.

Step 5...First, go to window and check it under day light.

Step 6...Now, stand on toilet to be closer to light in ceiling. Check strip.

Step 7...Close one eye. Squint other eye.

Step 8...Turn on several lamps around house. Hold strip under lamp. Check strip.

Step 9...Hold strip OVER lamp. Check strip.

Step 10...Hold strip in front of lamp so light shines THROUGH strip, just in case.

Step 11...Pull stick apart. Hesitate for a heartbeat when you realize you are holding the still wet "wick" in one hand, then continue the destruction.

Step 12...Repeat Steps 5-9.

Step 13...Throw stick away.

Step 14...Pick stick back up out of trash.

Step 15...Repeat Steps 12 and 13 the rest of the day!


  1. Ahhh step old nemesis lol. I could NEVER resist holding it up to the ceiling light in our bathroom, *just in case*!

  2. That is so me, all of them! Sigh. If I had invested the money I´ve spent on PG tests....yes, I could have a nice Kate Spade instead of the knock-off, or any number of things.

  3. Sounds so familiar! I usually go and get my glasses and have a good look with them on too!