Wednesday, February 10, 2010

The good, the bad and the ugly

I'm a regular member of an online forum - a little while ago, we had a discussion about the good and bad parts of pregnancy. That got me thinking: what parts of this pregnancy have been good? What about bad? And how about downright ugly? Let's start with the ugly and work our way up...

The Ugly
Stretch marks from hell. I started getting stretchmarks ages ago...probably around 18 weeks or so? I wasn't really surprised - genetics determine whether or not you get them (which makes all of those magical lotions an expensive waste of time), and since I already had some from puberty I knew that I would probably get them now. Add to that a body expanding at twice the normal rate with twins, and it's Stretch Mark City, population: Me. I have them on my boobs, on my sides, on my hips, and of course on my belly. I can't say how many I have - counting them would be too depressing. (Side note: I never knew that stretch marks go in a circle around your belly button. Of course it makes sense since that's how the muscle goes, but I'd never actually seen it - in person or in photos - until I got them.)

The Bad

Morning sickness. Hardly unique, but it still sucks. For about four months I was nauseated 24/7 and feeling like I was perpetually on the verge of puking - I never actually threw up, but sometimes I think that just feeling like you're constantly about to is worse.

Fatigue. It's hard enough to cope with the sudden inrush of hormones and the morning sickness - add in wanting to collapse from exhaustion all the time and it's just the icing on the cake. I never got the second trimester pick-me-up that people talk about, so this feeling has been around since I was about 5 weeks pregnant. And yes, it's getting old.

Swelling. I've mentioned my water retention cankles before. Enough said.

Heartburn. I've gone through what seems like about 500 pounds of antacid tablets over the course of this pregnancy. The good news is that last week I finally found something that actually works: Zantac. One pill a day and heartburn is no more! It may be my new best friend.


Physical challenges. This isn't so much one thing as a whole host of them lumped together, and I'll be the first to admit that this is probably harder for me than for the average pregnant woman - carrying an extra baby around will do that to you, and right now, at 28 weeks, I'm about the size of a woman with a singleton pregnancy at 35 weeks. It's not just not being able to pick stuff up off the floor or put on socks or even having heave myself with all my might just to turn over in bed. The sheer weight of the babies is difficult these days - the underside of my stomach is perpetually sore, and I'm thinking of buying a maternity support belt to try to relieve some of the pressure off my back. It's physically exhausting in a way I never expected.

Donkey crotch. OK, this one is a little weird. It doesn't seem to happen to all pregnant women - just a few unlucky ones like myself! Basically, it's normal pelvic soreness taken to the next level: it feels like I've been kicked in the crotch by a donkey. All. The. Time. Walking is painful, stairs are suicide (why did we buy a two story house? WHY???), and having to lift my legs - like getting in and out of bed or the car - is the worst; the pain has actually brought tears to my eyes. There's nothing that can be done except to power through it, although I've found that gently rocking on an exercise ball can bring temporary relief.

The Good
For a long time, I wondered why on earth would anyone voluntarily do this. I'm not a baby or child lover...in fact, I actively dislike them. But I already love these babies more than I can even express, and that makes it worth it. Every single day I tell them, "This is getting hard for me. But it's OK, you do what you need to do and keep growing - I'll handle it. We can do this." Because there are these things - the good things.

Quickening. I love feeling the boys shift and move. It's incredible to know that's new life that's moving in me, that I'm charged with carrying and protecting them. Even when it feels like they're playing soccer in the middle of the night and keeping me awake, it's still a joy to feel it.

They're unique. I'm amazed and fascinated that they have such different personalities, although they're not even born yet! Twin A is laid back and easygoing - Twin B is very demanding and if I lay on my right side (where he is), he'll kick me until I roll back over onto my other side because he doesn't like being squashed. It's absolutely incredible to realize that these are two little individuals, and I wonder if what I see as their personality traits right now will be true when they're born as well - if A will be calm and quiet, and if B will be more rambunctious and rowdy.

They're us...and yet more. There is simply nothing more amazing than creating a life, one that is half you and half the man you love. I look at Mr Bibliosaur and I'm humbled and amazed to think that the man whom I love so much will be part of these children. I look at him and wonder if they'll have his eyes, his mouth, his way of laughing. It's incredible to think that these little individuals are somehow more than just the sum of the two of us.

What about you? What are the good and bad points in your pregnancy?

7 comments:

  1. You have just said all of things that are going on with me! I feel your pain even more though cause you have two of them in there!

    Zantac- I am tempted to write the company and tell them how much I truly love them and thank them for saving my sanity. I feel bad that you have been agonizing up until now! I don't know if you know yet, but they do tend to work better if you catch the heartburn in the early stages rather than taking a pill when it's fullblown.

    The stretch mark issue is ridiculous! I knew I would get them because of genetics, so thankfully I haven't invested alot of time in preventing them in hopes that I would be more comfortable with them when they arrives.... but alas, they are still miserable even when prepared.... Mine have been around for ages too, but it makes me worry when you say that they go in a ring around your belly button as mine are only on the lower half so far and I am terrified to see how far this will go!

    Now for the big one.... Donkey crotch... pretty sure I have never heard it called that! Unfortunately I am with you on this one too though and I have definitely been brought to tears by it. Especially in the middle of the night when I can't roll over because the pain takes my breath away to put pressure on only the one side of my pelvis for even a second. I went to the chiropractor yesterday in hopes of some relief... I think it may take more than one session.

    Sooo I'm sure there is more to add, but I can't think of it... It makes me feel better to know there is someone experiencing the same thing as I am.... However, I wouldn't wish any of these things on ANYONE! I hope you get some relief soon, and the countdown is on for you being off work soon I think :)I, unfortunately, will be working until the bitter end so I hope that this chiropractor can help!

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  2. I love when the baby kicks. My son used to be extremely active around 1am, every night after I hit 5 months. So active, he once made the bed sheet flutter that was lying over my tummy. Priceless.

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  3. Happy SITS Sharefest Saturday. My pregnancies were both pretty easy...it was just the weight with the first one...but that's my own fault. Their is nothing like feeling a little life inside of you and that is all I remember.

    Holly
    504main.blogspot.com

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  4. I actually found this very interesting. If you'll see in my post (i think i was before you), I'm talking about the fears of motherhood in general. That doesn't even touch the fears of pregnancy! LOL. Donkey crotch... LOL, my coworker had this so bad she had to resign. The Dr. explained it as basically her pelvic bones were expanding & cracking to make room for baby. UGH! Cute blog =)

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  5. Very interesting post. Thanks for sharing. Hope you have a wonderful Valentine's Day. Lia

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  6. Hi there, really digging this blog and would like to add you to my blogroll if you're happy to exchange!

    Also if any of you are interested in freebies we're running a Valentine's giveaway at Babes about Town blog for sexy Amoralia lingerie for pregnant and nursing mamas!

    It's simple to enter, just leave a comment ;-)

    http://babesabouttown.com/2010/02/amoralia-tasteful-lingerie-and-giveaway/

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  7. I hate the stretch marks. People say to look at them as battle scars and be proud of them blah blah blah but I hate mine and want them to go away.

    Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!

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